Elvira – not so hot right now

I am not really a girly girl.  Sure, I own a crapload of makeup, but no pointy toe shoes.  My idea of couture is flip-flops.  However, I do occasionally indulge myself with some girlish delights, namely manicures & eyebrow waxes.

My usual mani place, for some totally retarded reason, is closed on Sundays.  In an act that proves I am no girly girl (as a real girly girl has a stronger loyalty to her manicurist than her parents / boyfriend / sibling), I decided to just find another place.  Which brought me to this dive up on Western and Addison, a couple blocks from my house.  Manis for $10, eyebrow waxing for $8.  How could you go wrong?

My manicurist was obviously trying to set the world record for cuticle trimming, because she was hauling ass so fast she cut me.  THREE TIMES!  Every time I type the “E” key or the “Shift” key, I get a sharp burn in my ring finger.  Rock.

But I wasn’t smart enough to just run out screaming, I had to follow through with the waxing.  I was almost in tears.  It felt like she was waxing off my entire eyebrow.  I was conviced she had misunderstood me and didn’t think I just wanted “eyebrow shaping”.  I have never felt such a deep pit in my stomach as when she reached in the drawer and pulled out what looked like a pencil.  I was certain that my entire browline was silky smooth and she was about to do me the enormous favor of penciling in some brows.  Luckily, all she had in her hand was tweezers.  But I wasn’t far off.  My eyebrows are so narrow, I look like Elvira.  It is worse, since I have the tendency to raise my right eyebrow.  A LOT.  and this action makes me look like satan’s spawn.

Long story short, if you find a place you like, wait if they aren’t open.  Schedule another day.  If you are looking for a new place, please please please consult the girliest girl you know before doing anything.  Trust me.

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