Hotel 71 is pretty lame

So I had a thing where I could stay in Hotel 71 for a night. It turns out that it’s also the cheapest hotel in all of downtown, and I think for several good resons:

1. The beds are too close to the door. So at 6:25 am when Mr. Mc2-way had to be using his 2-way in the hall, I could hear everything very well, especially the annoying ‘beep’ you get after each sentence.
2. The elevators take their sweet-ass time. Like 45 minutes. It took so long for the elevator to get to the lobby, I was thinking it could have been broken, then when it got there, seriously 30 people walked out. Same thing happened the other three times I used it.
3. No room service. This isn’t a big deal unless it’s late at night and evrything around you is closed. I guess if you bill your place as “A Stylishly Different Chicago Hotel,” you have to do things differently than every other hotel, like not serve food to your guests.
4. Valet full. So I wouldn’t have driven there if I knew this was going to happen. I imagine the valet is the only way this place makes money, so if anyone comes by looking for parking, they have it. But they don’t have it for guests. The guy was very nice, “You can park around the corner at 111 E Wacker for $30, or if you want, they have valet next door for $40.”
5. They didn’t open the door. I just figued that since I had three bags, one of the two worker dudes who were standing right in front of the door, could have done their job. Maybe they were valet dudes, and weren’t supposed to open it. That might be the case, because after I walked through the rain around the corner to get my ride, the doorman dude was all “How long are you going to be here?” And I was like, “well, probably 45 minutes since that’s how long it takes to get the elevator.”

So if you don’t mind all that stuff, Hotel 71, man.

1 Comment so far

  1. Jason (unregistered) on April 19th, 2005 @ 11:21 pm

    Yeah, pretty lame. I was so sad when it was no longer the Executive Plaza, which reminded me of Mexico City for some reason. The story I’ve been told about Hotel 71 is that it was the pet project of the wife of a guy who owns a bunch of corporate extended stay places. The awful design throughout backs this theory up. It’s like an HGTV show gone wrong.

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